Narcissism has not only become a normalized social condition, it is increasingly being incentivized. The framework of narcissism with the central pillars of lack of empathy, entitlement, grandiosity, superficiality, anger, rage, arrogance, and shallow emotion is a manifestation of pathological insecurity – an insecurity that is experienced at both the individual and societal level. The paradox is that we value these patterns – and venerate them through social media, mainstream media, and consumerism, they represent a fast-track to financial and professional success. These traits are endemic in political, corporate, academic, and media leaders. There are few lives which are not personally touched by narcissists – be it your spouse, partner, parent, child, colleague, boss, friend, sibling, or neighbor. Whether societally or individually, the toxic wave of narcissism, entitlement, and pathological insecurity is harming us all. The enticements of charm, charisma, confidence, and success can draw us in or blind us to the damaging truths of narcissism. The invalidation inherent in these relationships infects those are in them with self-doubt, despair, confusion, anxiety, depression and the chronic feeling of being “not enough,” all of which make it so difficult to step away and set boundaries. The illusion of hope and the fantasy of redemption can result in years of second chances for narcissists, and despondency when change never comes. It’s time for a wake-up call. Health and wellness campaigns preach avoidance of unhealthy foods, sedentary lifestyles, tobacco, drugs, alcohol, but rarely preach avoidance of unhealthy or toxic people. Yet the health benefits of removing toxic people from a life may have a far greater benefit to both physical and psychological health than going to the gym. We need to learn to be better gatekeepers for our minds, bodies, and souls. Instead of habituating to the global shift of validating narcissism and other toxic patterns, it’s time to understand it and take our lives back. Dr. Ramani Durvasula is a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in Santa Monica and Sherman Oaks, CA and Professor of Psychology at California State University, Los Angeles, where she was named Outstanding Professor in 2012. She is also a Visiting Professor at the University of Johannesburg.

She is the author of the modern relationship survival manual Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving a Relationship With a Narcissist (Post Hill Press) She is also the author of You Are WHY You Eat: Change Your Food Attitude, Change Your Life, as well as the author of numerous peer reviewed journal articles, book chapters and conference papers.

Dr. Ramani received her B.S. in Psychology from the University of Connecticut, and her MA and Ph.D. degrees in Clinical Psychology from UCLA.

She brings a wealth of expertise in relationships, sexuality, health and wellness. Dr. Ramani was the co-host of Oxygen’s series My Shopping Addiction, and has also been featured on series on Bravo, the Lifetime Movie Network, National Geographic, the History Channel, Discovery Science, and Investigation Discovery as well as in documentary films on health. She has been a featured commentator on nearly every major television network, as well as radio, print, and Internet media. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

Marica’s experience along with her voice to share her story inspired her and created a platform for her to reach, motivate

95% of North Americans either go to bed or wake up worrying about something. Yet, worrying is the #1 killer of creativity, performance and dreams. When revolutionary brand strategist Isabelle Mercier-Turcotte discovered “What we tolerate we worry about,” she realized a little structure brings a lot of inner flexibility and freedom. The result is her simple yet powerful model to help you instantly decrease worry and increase peace of mind.

Isabelle Mercier — isabelle@leapzonestrategies.com — is a ‘no-nonsense’ dynamo born to catapult passionate entrepreneurs to build infectious and impactful brands, businesses and lives.

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx

TEDxKC 2013: Defy Impossible. Anne Mahlum is a social entrepreneur who loves to create and build with purpose. The majority of her focus over the past four years has been on Back on My Feet, a non-profit organization she started in Philadelphia in 2007 that uses the power of running to change the way those experiencing homelessness see themselves so they can make real change in their lives.

Anne regularly speaks at corporate events, academic institutions and conferences. She has presented on leadership, inspiration, the business behind starting a nonprofit, fundraising, social change and of course, the issue of homelessness.

In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)

A powerful personal testimony from domestic abuse survivor Norah Casey on the complex and misunderstood reason why women stay in violent relationships. The real question, she says, is not why we stay but how do we leave. Having spoken to other domestic abuse survivors she charts what she believes are the four phases of an abusive intimate relationship from seduction to the final blow and the hardest (and most dangerous) part of all – having the courage to finally walk away. Broadcaster and publishing entrepreneur Norah Casey was formerly a Dragon in the popular television series Dragons’ den and is a well-known radio and television personality. Her book Spark! was published by Penguin in 2015 and her TedX talk The Cure for Grief has been watched by thousands.

Over the past five years Norah has helped over 1000 business start-ups directly and indirectly. While most of her work in start-ups began as a result of her role in Dragons’ Den she has extended her reach beyond that into other investment spaces. As well as owning Harmonia Publishing Ltd, which is engaged in magazine publishing, digital media, app development, events, creative communications and data analysis, Norah also owns Harmonia Investments (home to a range of investments in diverse areas such as home storage, children’s accessories, media and fashion in both the UK and Ireland). She also owns her own production company Miss Clover Media. Her expertise is in moulding budding entrepreneurs into potential business owners. She does one to one consultations, runs business clinics for budding entrepreneurs and SMEs and mentors early stage start-ups and those seeking growth potential at two to three years maturation. She also hosts, speaks and moderates at a wide range of conferences, seminars, training programmes and bespoke mentorship programmes here and abroad. She is currently writing her second book: Secrets of a Dragon: The 100 Things You Need to Know To Start Your Own Business.
A journalist and former nurse, Norah has been Ireland’s Publisher of the Year no fewer than four times. She has served on numerous boards and is currently a member of the Press Council of Ireland, the London-based Womens Irish Network and The International Womens Forum. She is a former Veuve Clicquot Business Woman of the Year. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

Dr. Golden shares how men can overcome the pain of emotional abuse.

Timothy J. Golden is Professor of Philosophy, Legal Studies Program Coordinator, and Director of the Donald Blake Center for the Study of Race, Ethnicity, and Culture at Walla Walla University. His areas of specialization are 19th and 20th Century European Philosophy, African-American Philosophy/Critical Race Theory, and Philosophy of Religion/Philosophical Theology. He is the author of two books currently under contract and the editor of two other books, also under contract. He teaches courses at WWU in each of his areas of specialization. Dr. Goldens career in academic philosophy is his second career. He has also been a criminal defense lawyer in Philadelphia, Pa. His law degree is from the Thurgood Marshall School of Law, and his Ph.D. in philosophy is from the University of Memphis. He enjoys acting and cooking.

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx

Narcissists are on the rise, especially in the workforce. While the research is still out on why this is happening; Ann Barnes outlines the different kinds of narcissists, and provides a framework on how to work with them (or not!). Ann began her legal career acting as a lawyer and business advisor for numerous private and publicly held companies. She specialized in corporate securities and intellectual property law within the entertainment and consumer packaged goods industries.

Her parallel passion for health and wellness led her to quit law and found and operate a number of superfood companies. Ann is a well-respected public speaker and health advocate and has written two health based recipe books: “Be a Better Being” and “Eat Super, Be Super”.

Over 6 years ago, Ann’s passion for plant-based wellness and entrepreneurial opportunities resulted in her funding, co-founding and acting as Chairman for the first Canadian licensed Medical Cannabis Company: Peace Naturals Project. A year ago she sold the majority of her interest to the medical cannabis public company.

Her greatest accomplishment is being a Mom to her 2 teens, who keep her on her game at all times. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

Chiaras emotional talk covers the subject of domestic abuse. “I chose this topic because violence against women is still seen as a taboo and more specifically a ‘women’s issue’ when really, it is everyone’s problem. I would like to challenge you to dispel any stereotypes they may have about abuse. If I can help just one person free themselves of an abusive relationship with my words, then that would be one less person living in unjust suffering. In the words of Maya Angelou: ‘Each time a woman stands up for herself, she stands up for all women’.” Chiara Lisowski leaves us without words. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

Messaging around sexual assault prevention is largely aimed at women and cloaked in helpful advice: dont walk alone, dont get drunk, dont put yourself at risk. Essentially, dont get raped.

What if we turn this attention to a different population and say, dont rape? What are we doing wrong as a culture that we continue to produce rapists?

Through poignant storytelling, award-winning author and investigative producer Amy Herdy explores the cycle of sexual abuse and examines the dangers of dismissing our most violent predators as monsters.

For more than twenty years, journalist and author Amy Herdy has specialized in trauma reporting, particularly sexual assault.

Ms. Herdy’s professional engagements include teaching workshops on investigative reporting and trauma journalism for the U.S. State Department in Lahore, Karachi and Islamabad, Pakistan. Her awards include an Emmy; Society of Professional Journalists awards; a Radio, Television News Directors Association award; an Associated Press award; two American Society of Newspaper Editors awards and a Military Reporters

Parenting is always a reflection of our best selves and our worst selves. Despite good intentions and efforts, every parent has deficits which can harm children with lifelong trauma and even death. Fiona Douglas suggests a way to remedy parental deficits so that all children can experience safer and more secure childhoods. Fiona Douglas is an advocate for greater awareness of child abuse and domestic violence issues. Over the past ten years, Fiona has supported hundreds of people in crisis in the UK and in China. Most importantly, she has been inspired by the courage of people living in crisis, and the power of conversations to change lives. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx